Whiskey Lullaby
by Kyrie Star
Summary: Adrian and Rose, what more can i say? Inspired by the song by Bard Paisley and Alison Kruass. AxR, non canon.


_**Whiskey Lullaby**_

**So this is just a one shot to prove to my sisters (all five of them) that I'm not an Adrian hater, so this is about Adrian and how he felt when he found out that Rose had cheated on him and that she left him, once his anger had subsided.**

**This was inspired by the song Whiskey Lullaby by Bard Paisley and Alison Krauss. I would say listen as you read, but it is your choice.**

**-Kye**

_Adrian POV:_

My hands trembled as I watched her, watched her be happy with him. Lifting the bottle of whiskey to my lips I drank another swallow.

I was torturing myself, but I couldn't help it. She was everything I wanted, everything and so much more, and I had had her right there in my arms and she left, left me with a broken heart and nothing else. She was an angel in a snow parka, with a bruise around her eye, a temptress in that red dress that Tasha had given her, and the woman I wanted to marry.

Walking back to my room I thought about the times we had spent together, the times she had smiled that beautiful smile of hers. She was all I ever thought of now days, she was everything to me. But I was nothing to her.

Lissa's words repeated themselves in my head, over and over.

"_She does love you, she just doesn't know it yet." she said. "Give her time."_

"_I don't think so." I replied. "She'll never love me, not while she loves him."_

"_Believe me, I know her better than anyone. Give her time, she'll come back to you."_

My room door brought me back from my memories, turning the key in the lock reminded me of the day we set her free, to save her life.

The day I sent her away with him, to save her when we all knew she would never have killed the Queen, a fighter she is, a killer she's not.

I slammed the door behind me, everything reminded me of her, those chocolate brown eyes, that soft, wavy hair that she always said was such a dark brown it was almost black. Her beautiful soul that everyone could see, not just me. The way she looked like an Arabian Princess.

Tipping the bottle back I drained the last three quarters, it was my seventh bottle this morning, I had to change from vodka because the only one that was strong enough to get me drunk was Russian and that reminded me of him and the way he stole her from me before I even got a chance.

Throwing the bottle at the wall I screamed, baring my pain to the world, but no one would hear me. I made sure that my room was sound-proof, and that was a good thing.

"_She loves you so much, she's just denied it for so long its second nature to her now, I think you need to stop drinking and take these." She handed me something, "They're the same pills they gave me, anti-depressants. Please take them, and take care of yourself, if not for me, then for Rose."_

Sighing I picked up the small bottle that I had thrown into the kitchen when I had gotten home, planing on never touching them, _maybe that's why she can't love me. She's scared that when the darkness takes over, I'll hurt her._ I read the label and while it was hard considering how much I had drunk, I read that it said _take two, twice daily_ smiling I pulled two out and downed them with a glass of water, put the lid back on and shoved them in the draw.

I stumbled to my bed to sleep off the whiskey and picked up the note I had written ages ago, when I had thought of killing myself, my need to be with her driving the darkness in me into a frenzy. It only had one line, _I'll love her 'till I die._

As I lay down, the note pressed into my hand, I sighed. I would fix this, make everything better and she would love me, just like Lissa said.

The darkness closed over my head and I felt a tear slide down my face as I rolled over and pressed my face into the pillow, _who am I fooling here? Her, or me?_

_Rose POV:_

It was all over court, all those rumours saying that he had waited for me, waited for my love. It had taken the better part of three years to realise that Dimitri wasn't mine and he never would be. And the one I loved was gone, and had been for four years today.

He was gone.

Adrian was gone.

With those three words I felt my heart break more than it had when I thought of losing Dimitri, when I thought I **had** lost him, more than when I thought I had killed him. But what was worse was that he had been gone for years and only Lissa had been there for me, I had told Dimitri I couldn't be with him, I hadn't been to work in months, no one came to see me but Lis and Dimitri, not even Eddie or Mia, who were now together, or Christian who was back with Lissa now. No one wanted anything to do with me.

His favourite past time had become mine, drinking. Drowning my sorrows in a bottle of whiskey, I had found plenty of it in his room, which suffice to say was now mine.

He had no use for it now, he was where angels sang and hearts rejoiced. I hoped he had met Mason there and that they were happy.

I sighed and wiped away the tears again. It hurt, thinking about him, but that was all I could do, he was the best thing to happen to me, he was my best friend, my love, my heart, my _**life**_. And when he died, I became nothing. I had been on my way back to him when I had found out and it broke my heart every time.

"_Rose? It's Christian." he paused and cleared his throat, but I had heard the tears in his voice, "Rose, Adrian's-."_

"_NO! Don't you dare say it! He can't be gone! I just... I just..." the tears falling down my face blinded me to the man sitting across from me, one last trip to say good-bye, Dimitri had said and now I knew why, he didn't want me to be alone when Christian's call came._

_Lissa had called me a few hours ago and told me to come home, __**after **__talking to Dimitri for a while. I shuddered as my phone slipped from my fingers, my hand going to the stake on my belt._

I had been too quick for Dimitri to stop, but I hadn't managed to finish it, I hadn't cut deep enough into my wrist, the scar now the only reminder I had of that phone call, my phone was thrown out the window once Dimitri had stopped the bleeding, and I would've gone out too, if the Russian hadn't held me to my chair, forcing me to stay in this world.

Glancing up at the clock I saw it was almost time for Dimitri to come talk me out of here, but he would give up once Claire, his wife of two months, but lover of three years would call and he would leave, leaving behind a plate of food that would be thrown in the bin by Lissa tomorrow.

I had been to see Adrian's grave yesterday, the first time since his actual funeral, and it hadn't changed. The old willow still reached out over the river with the rope swing on the low branch, where Adrian had hung it. His tombstone still said that he was, _**was**_,a great friend, son and, Lissa had made them put on there for me, Lover.

The tears kept coming, no one knew how he died, all they knew was that he had been drinking, Lissa had cleaned his room the night before and had taken away all his empty bottles but that morning there had been five empty ones and one that was smashed. So they said he drank himself to death.

So I was trying to do the same, but it wasn't working, and they wouldn't let me see his reports, I thought there was something more to his death. But Lissa changed the subject when I brought it up.

Standing from my place on the floor I walked into the kitchen, something I hadn't done in ages, I picked at the food Lissa had brought in this morning but had no apatite for it at all. I threw it in the bin, plate and all. I couldn't look at it any more, it was like they were trying to bring me back to life when I was already dead. In a way I had been dead for years, after Lissa brought me back, but I had brought myself back after that, so I was alive on the outside, but inside I was dead; cold and dead.

Looking down I noticed that one of the draws were open. No one had been here but me and I always watched everyone that did, no one had touched the draw that I had seen. So why was it open?

I pulled it open, listening to the rattle as I did. There was only a small bottle in the draw, the label cracked and brown, but I knew what it was. It was the last ingredient to my death cocktail.

Shrugging I picked up the bottle and dumped the entire contents into the last of my bottle of whiskey, just as there was a soft knock on the door.

"Come in." I called, my voice cracking from lack of use. I put my death cocktail in the cupboard and began cleaning up the kitchen. I wasn't surprised when Dimitri's head popped around the corner, but the surprise on his face made me smile.

"Hey, Roza." he started, same as he always did, but this time I wasn't going to let him basically talk to himself. "How are you feeling?"

"Hey yourself there Comrade. I'm, well I'm trying." I replied and the stunned look on his face said it all. "Do you want to sit in the lounge room and talk for a bit?"

"Sure." he replied, unsure how to treat me now I was talking back.

We talked until his phone rang and I gave him a small smile, "Answer it, go home."

He looked at me, "Are you sure?"

I nodded, "I'll be here tomorrow, and the next day and the next day."

He answered his phone, "Hey Claire-Bear. Yeah I will be soon. No, she's talking again. I'll tell her you said that. And I'll tell her that too and ask her. I love you."

My smile faltered for a moment, knowing I was going to hurt them all. But I pulled it back into place as he hung up and turned back to me.

"Claire says she's glad you're trying, and that the next step is eating, ok?" He grinned, "If it helps, I'll bring over pizza and brownies tomorrow?"

"Sounds good." I said softly. "But don't go to any extra effort for me, I've been eating some of the food for a while now."

"Claire loves cooking for you and while you don't always eat it, she's just glad that you do sometimes." he glanced at the floor, "Roza, Claire wants me to tell you that she's pregnant and she's having a girl. She wants to name her after you. If that's ok?"

"That's fine." I whispered, a tear slid down my face. "You should go home now, and don't worry about me any more. I'll be fine, in time."

"Are you sure? I could stay if you want?" he asked.

"No, go home to your wife, kiss her good night and tell her, I'll see her soon." it was a lie, I knew it, but he didn't. I could see the hope spark in his eyes, he was taking it as a promise to leave this room soon, but that wasn't it.

He stood up, "Well, I'll see you tomorrow then, Roza."

"Good-bye, Comrade." I smiled as I hugged him tightly, "I'll see you soon."

He walked out the door and I waited a few moments before walking over and locking it behind him then going into the kitchen.

Grabbing my death cocktail out of the cupboard, I picked up my favourite photo of Adrian, it had been taken right after I came back, before I got Dimitri's letter saying he was alive.

He looked so alive, so vibrant and happy, I looked shell shocked but happy to be home. His arms were around my waist, his lips pressing a small kiss to my temple as he spun me around, his smile showing how happy he was. I saw the tear fall but couldn't stop it from hitting the photo, then I felt every tear I had yet to shed start to dry up, _I will be there soon, my love._

Turning on my heel, I walked into Adrian's room and lay down on his bed, and downed the whole bottle, soft clumps of the pills with the pale amber liquid. I rolled onto my side and thought of the man I was heading to see.

The darkness lulled me to sleep, but through it all I could hear a banging on the door and a Russian voice screaming at me to open the door.

But he was too late, I looked down at the bed and the tiny, sick looking girl in it; she had rolled onto her stomach and was now face down in the pillow, the picture clutched tightly in her hand, holding it against her chest, an empty bottle rolled away from her outstretched hand. I turned away from her and smiled at the green eyed angel standing beside me.

"What took you so long?" he asked.

"I had to say good-bye to my best friends." I replied. "Make sure they would be fine without me, not that I've really been there for them."

Adrian leaned down, "That's good enough for me." his lips met mine and I felt my fear disappear. _This is my heaven._ Was my last thought before I was gone.

_She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger,_

_And finally drank away his memory._

_Life is short but this time it was bigger,_

_Than the strength she had to get up off her knees._

_We found her with her face down in the pillow,_

_Clinging to his picture for dear life._

_They laid her next to him beneath the willow,_

_While the angels sung a whiskey lullaby._

_**The End.**_


End file.
